sings Da Doo War War By Pepe
It's time for the 3am question. A
crisis erupts - or is manufactured - in some
turbulent part of the world and putative US
President Mitt Romney must rise to the occasion.
What is a gallant server of the 47% to do to save
the free world?
An inkling of 47% Mitt's
foreign policy vision was offered by his speech in
Virginia early this week.  Some have called it
Mission Impossible. But no, this is not Lalo
Schifrin territory. Too cool. 
due respect to grandmaster Phil Spector, this is
more like the Wall of Sound.
So here's how
Mitt is going to save the Empire from decline. Move
over, Crystals, and say hello to Mitt's
version of Da Doo Ron Ron  : Da Doo War
Yeah, my heart stood still
Wall of Sound Mitt could also go roots and
do a Slim Harpo/Yardbirds take on Got War If
You Want It.  But Da Doo War War is more
appropriate to his family man image. Got Iraq? Da
Doo War War; none of this "abrupt withdrawal of
our entire troop presence" nonsense. We're going
after anything that moves - Sunnis, Shi'ites,
al-Qaeda, Eye-ranian spies, Sadrists. Who cares if
we can't stay legally? We stay illegally. And if
anyone complains, we reinvade.
(without Pak)? We stay there way beyond 2014. And
with all our nuggets in the Empire of Bases
intact. For Mitt, "the route to more war - and to
potential attacks here are home" is…to wage
endless war. None of this nonsense of a
"politically timed retreat that abandons the
Afghan people to the same extremists who ravaged
their country and used it to launch the attacks of
9/11". Mitt, though, has not released any details
of how he plans to prosecute Enduring Freedom
Got Iran? Mitt will "put the
leaders of Iran on notice"; he will "prevent them
from acquiring nuclear weapons capability"; he
will "impose new sanctions on Iran, and will
tighten the sanctions we currently have"; he will
"restore the permanent presence of aircraft
carrier task forces in both the Eastern
Mediterranean and the Gulf region" (well, they are
already parked there anyway).
So expect a
Mitt-ordered naval blockade - to complement the
Obama-ordered financial blockade. The next step
would be Da Doo War War all the way; after all,
Mitt has vowed to wage war "for the sake of
Got Syria? It's Da Doo (Civil)
War. Trust Mitt to "identify and organize" every
Salafi-jihadi in town "who share our values" -
perhaps by having them undergo an anti-Americanism
test ("Have you ever belonged to a terrorist
As much as "the president
has failed to lead in Syria", Wall of Sound Mitt
will "work with our partners to identify and
organize those members of the opposition who share
our values and ensure they obtain the arms they
need to defeat Assad's tanks, helicopters, and
fighter jets." Forget about that "leading from
behind" nonsense; welcome back to the 1980s jihad
against the Soviets remix.
That's slow motion Da Doo War War to enable his
close pal Benjamin Bibi Netanyahu to smash what's
left of the Palestinians. Mitt's plan is to "kick
the ball down the field and hope that ultimately,
somehow, something will happen and resolve it" -
as he said in his 47% fund raiser. Perhaps the
Lord high above will say "I'm mad as hell and I
can't take it anymore" and unleash Armageddon, who
knows. Anyway, forget about Mitt even trying to
sell the illusion to the Palestinians that one day
they will have a state. Got Middle Kingdom China?
Da Doo War War would be quite a red line - after
all they are the US's creditors - but Mitt will
emit his mighty roar against their "assertiveness"
which is "sending chills through the region".
Got Russia - aka the Soviet Union? Da Doo
(Cold) War all the way, as in last April; Mitt is
no wimp like those Obamites who entered "into an
agreement with the Soviets, excuse me, with
Russia" on nuclear negotiations.  Russian
President Vladimir Putin should be quaking inside
his judo black belt; "There will be no flexibility
with Vladimir Putin." Got Yemen, Somalia, Central
Africa, even, who knows, Venezuela? Da Doo (Drone)
In a nutshell; all those Chinks,
Soviets, Ay-rabs, Eye-ranians only respect one
thing; the power of the stick. The Wall of Sound.
Da Doo War War.
No, his name is not Bill.
The man who Bill Clinton now calls
"Moderate Mitt" has proven to be an immoderately
stern foreign policy ace. Time for a quick recap.
According to his credo, couched by a wall of
neo-con armchair warriors, the Soviet Union,
"excuse me", Russia, is the US number one enemy.
The Palestinians - well, they basically
should roll over and die. The Brits, they are a
bunch of pampered moochers; who knows whether they
would be capable of hosting the Olympics at a Salt
Lake City level. The whole of Spain is a 47%
wasteland; certified moochers, alongside, who
knows, most of the Spanish-speaking universe; and
by the way the pain in Spain was the government's
fault (when in fact it is derived from a private
sector real estate bubble).
How to rate
such a Hall of Fame performance? Enter a voice of
reason via Colonel Lawrence Wilkerson, former
chief of staff for Colin Powell. Commenting on
Mitt's past and future foreign policy
achievements, Wilkerson said, "Utterly
unbelievable…Romney [is] "operating on a Cold War
music sheet". 
Cold War indeed. What's
left for us mere survivors is to join in the Mitt
sing-along. Here's how Phil Spector put together
the instrumental track for Da Doo Ron Ron.  Feel
free to add your own words - and in the best Cold
War Wall of Sound spirit, let's all merrily gun
down Da Doo War War.