A $4.4 billion drop in the
bucket By The Mogambo Guru
As the 321Gold.com site titled it,
"Merrill in emergency weekend talks", which I took
to be a news report that Merrill Lynch, probably
like all the other financial hustlers out there,
is looking at a few zillions of dollars in
collateralized losses, with the attendant angry
customers and their snarling lawyers, who then
look out of the windows of their fancy offices and
notice there are buzzards circling overhead, and
they know right then that they are just dead meat
walking.
So I can see how they would be in
"emergency talks", and I laughed at their
predicament, but not the good "hahaha!" kind of
laugh where everybody is having a good time, but the
"hahahahahahahahaha!" kind
that has a lot of sneering scorn and Vicious
Mogambo Schadenfreude (VMS), where I not only take
delight in the suffering of these yahoos who
deserve to suffer, but I positively revel in the
stuff, and want to see them suffer more because of
the sheer degree of misery they have caused, and I
laugh derisively "hahaha!" out loud, and I send
them hate mail ("Dear Financial Hustling Scumbag,
I hate you!", which I sign as "Anonymous Yet
Highly Disgruntled (AYHD)").
And I exhibit
not only a lot of laughing revelry and scorn
sprinkled liberally with cursing, but an episode
of Vicious Mogambo Schadenfreude (VMS), usually
concludes with some gut-wrenching coughing and
trying to catch my breath, some more cursing, and
a lot of rude gestures as a final, gratuitous
dollop of deserved disdain and disrespect.
Naturally, I had planned something more
dramatic in response to all the misery called by
"financial innovation", like jumping up on the
table, grabbing my crotch and yelling, "You want
some financial innovation? I got your financial
innovation right here, you thieving morons!"
Tragically, I had to cut that terrific
piece of performance art out of my routine since
my wife says I can't practice the
jumping-on-top-of-table move anymore, unless I go
get my own coffee table, because she says I am
"ruining" the one in the living room. So I
naturally tried to patiently explain it to her. I
said, "All the other tables are too high, and when
I try to jump on top of them, I bump my head on
the ceiling! Are you too stupid to see it? Huh? Is
that it? Are you too stupid? Or maybe you can't
see it because you are so busy looking for every
little fault of mine so that you can criticize me,
in everything I say or do, always pick, pick, pick
at me until I am sick, and I am talking sick to
freaking death here, of it!"
But even
after I carefully and calmly explain it to her
like that, does she care? No! So to hell with it
AND her!
As you can tell, this whole damn
thing is, like all drama, emotionally draining. So
much so, in fact, that I save it for those who are
the most deserving, and there is hardly anyone in
America who doesn't deserve to be taken out into
the street and slapped silly for being so stupid
(audience shouts out, "How stupid, Mogambo?") that
they believed in the exquisite fairy tale that
combines getting "something-for nothing" with
"debts and deficits don't matter", and who allowed
the government to get so big because the Federal
Reserve was allowed to create more than enough
money and credit to finance all the deficit
spending!
Year after year of monetary
inflation, decade after decade! More and more and
more money until my throat is raw and bloody from
screaming in outrage and fear, and the neighbors
are yelling "For God's sake, will somebody please
shut that Damned Mogambo Idiot (DMI) up so we can
get some sleep around here?"
Insomniac
neighbors aside, I figure that the sheer tonnage
of new money being dumped into the economic system
has got to be too much for simple stock markets,
bond markets and housing markets to absorb, and
derivatives were born to soak up all this damned
money that was being created.
The
Guardian.co.uk site uses the headline, "Merrill
seeks more funds to avoid crisis" as the title of
the article, with the subhead, "$4.4bn from
Singapore's Temasek not enough", which is what I
just finished saying, but I am not quoted anywhere
in the article, the bastards.
Here is
where I really started busting a gut laughing; as
OF COURSE $4.4 billion is not enough! The economic
system and the players in it have to absorb
trillions of dollars of current and future losses!
A piddly $4.4 billion? Hahahaha! Talk about your
proverbial "drop in the bucket"! Hahaha! Ugh.
The Mogambo Sez: Life is sweet, indeed,
for those who hold gold, silver and oil, and life
will get sweeter yet, as the Fed and the Congress
have not even gotten started cooking up their
inevitable monetary and fiscal stupidities to "do
something" to save the economy from their previous
monetary and fiscal stupidities that have caused
gold and commodity prices to get as high as they
are.
And thus gold, silver and oil (and
indeed all commodities) will make you and me rich
without our lifting a finger, or even getting up
off of our fat, stupid butts. And if you are even
remotely like me, then you think, like I think, as
all lazy people think, that this is the absolute
best way to make money! And it is! Whee!
Richard Daughty is general
partner and COO for Smith Consultant Group,
serving the financial and medical communities, and
the editor of The Mogambo Guru economic newsletter
- an avocational exercise to heap disrespect on
those who desperately deserve it.
(Republished with permission from The Daily Reckoning.
Copyright 2008, The Daily
Reckoning.)
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